War of Distruction

OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!! The war of discruction is more than happening here at my house. All being done by a cute faced adorable 2 year old! (I have to convince myself some days that she is cute and adorable!) You know what they say when you have kids? "They change your life forever", then you hear, "have patients. Chilren will give you patients". Well...! They have changed my life forever in a good way but they sure know how to wear my patients thin! I have child proofed my house (more than once, might I add!), I have to keep my counters and floors clean (which is not a bad thing), BUT!!!! Oh YES! There is a but in here!!! It is so dang hard to keep it all clean. No matter how clean this house is she STILL, I mean STILL finds something to get into. I could leave her in an empty house without running water and she could still manage to distroy the whole place! Lets take last night for example...
My SIL came over to our house. Fine and dandy. I like it when they come over. As they were leaving Ashlyn climbs into her van and wants to go home with her. We were like OK! SURE!!! So my SIL takes her home with her. Matt and I go over later to pick her up and she's having the time of her life playing with all of her cousins especially the one her age, Tiffany. Now Tiffany is 6 months younger than Ash and sometimes they get a long and sometimes they don't. No big deal, that's the way it usually works. My SIL said that Ash was really good and her and Tiff were playing well together. Matt and I sat down for a few mins cause my SIL's kids were watching The Passion of Christ. I think we were only down for about a portion of a clip and we all go, "where's Ashlyn!" This is a common phrase in both households since they lived with us and know what she is capable of. My SIL has 7 kids so she knows what it means to childproof a house. Her house is a bit messy due to moving into a new place and that's totally understandable. Other than that her house is usually pretty clean. Things are picked up. My SIL walks upstairs to her kitchen and finds ash standing there with a pile of blue mush all over her foot, legs, and hands. She immediately takes her over to he sink and starts washing her up, while Matt and I are hunting for what she had gotten into. It was all over her clothes too might I add. We kept asking Ash what it was and to show us where she got it from. She just kept saying "Marker! Marker!" and taking us different places. We knew she was trying to tell us but we couldn't figure it out. We went hunting around all of the rooms cause we couldn't figure out what she got into. It was like one of those unsolved mysteries. Finally Matt was teasing our oldest neice that whatever it was was all over her bedroom floor. So that gave us an idea and we went downstairs to the older kids rooms. Low and behold we found where the BLUE ooey gooey stuff came from! It was toy hair highlighter for bratz dolls left lying on a coffee table in the boys room. It was ALL OVER THE FLOOR!!!!!! I just about DIED!!! Brand new carpet and my child in less than 3 mins destroyed it. Needless to say that we got it all cleaned up. The carpet survived the bluing inident, but Mom and Aunt Anabelle just about didn't. But what you don't know is while SIL and I are cleaning up this HUGE blue mess Ash was supposed to be sitting and dad watching her. Well dad got involved into the movie and forgot all about watching his distructive 2 year old and I found her and her cousin upstairs with toothpaste ALL OVER THE PLACE!!! I yet again about died from HORROR!!!! So we bring the shampooer up an shampoo the upstairs carpet. I mentioned something to my hubby about watching her while SIL and I cleaned up the downstairs carpet and he looked at me like he had no idea he was supposed to be watching her. "I thought she was supposed to be sitting." I just looked at him.... (I guess you could say more like glower at him), and said, "and how long will an unattended two year old just sit?" Point taken! Now if any of you have any ideas on how to keep a2 year enertained with stressing out the mom let me know cause I either need to dicipline a 2 year old better or she's letting me know I'm not doing a very good job as a parent. I'll have to post some pics of her and her blue leg, feet, and hands when she wakes up. I will also post pics of her baby powder experience here soon too.